May 24, 2010
to buy new shoes or not to buy?
No this blog has not turned into a fashio blog. Although I should write at least one entry on clothes and eczema. Any who….. The real reason I write this entry is, I have eczema in between my left big toe and the next toe. Exactly where you need to place the toes when you where flip flops. I did not realise it and I did not feel a thing when I got into my car this morning. However a few minutes later while on the highway I had to take my flip flops off because it started to get uncomfortable. I have arrived at my destination and now I have to wear my flip flops mid-way. Its almost like I’m. Not wearing the flip flop but dragging it along. I feel like a person with a prosthesis leg! Dammit. Can’t go home and change my shoes cos home too far, and I am next in line for my appointment. My last resort maybe is to swing by a shoe shop and get proper shoes. Haih what a waste of money and time! To buy shoes or not to buy?
Itchy
September 23, 2009
Food Allergies.
A few months back I went to a new dermatologist recommended by a friend. With all due respect to the learned Dr. he too like all the doctors I have met thus far does not believe food allergies and eczema
In a huff I sought an allergy specialist. Luckily he accepted me without having to make an appointment.
Long story short, the Allergist confirmed the all the foods I knew I was allergic too and a few more. I now have 10 foods I cannot take. One of which is garlic! I looked at the doctor and said what on earth am I going to eat? It also means I cannot eat in restaurants, have dinner with friends or on a date with hubby.
Now my food has to come from home. I have to make my own food. I have to eat first before I make my way to a dinner meeting. It has been an adjustment.
However, because I have stuck to the diet, my skin is normal. It has come back to normal! I took a picture recently with a friend’s son. And my skin looked fantastic in the picture. It has been a while. HELLO!!
There are times when I fall off the band wagon and I have an itch attack. But the attack is not so bad and does not last for days. It dries up very fast and peels off very fast. It does not take weeks to mend. Depending on the severity of the attack.
Now I have to deal with the scars left by my eczema. Small price to pay. I see my scars as a story of my life. Just like people with tatoos and their ink represents their story.
Food Allergies.
A few months back I went to a new dermatologist recommended by a friend. With all due respect to the learned Dr. he too like all the doctors I have met thus far does not believe food allergies and eczema
In a huff I sought an allergy specialist. Luckily he accepted me without having to make an appointment.
Long story short, the Allergist confirmed the all the foods I knew I was allergic too and a few more. I now have 10 foods I cannot take. One of which is garlic! I looked at the doctor and said what on earth am I going to eat? It also means I cannot eat in restaurants, have dinner with friends or on a date with hubby.
Now my food has to come from home. I have to make my own food. I have to eat first before I make my way to a dinner meeting. It has been an adjustment.
However, because I have stuck to the diet, my skin is normal. It has come back to normal! I took a picture recently with a friend’s son. And my skin looked fantastic in the picture. It has been a while. HELLO!! There are times when I fall off the band wagon and I have an itch attack. But the attack is not so bad and does not last for days. It dries up very fast and peels off very fast. It does not take weeks to mend. Depending on the severity of the attack.
Now I have to deal with the scars left by my eczema. Small price to pay. I see my scars as a story of my life. Just like people with tatoos and their ink represents their story.
September 22, 2009
blogging on the go!
Guess what? My very techie little brother helped me to download wordpress on my berry. So now I can blog on the go. Which is good cos ikve not blogged regularly this year, cos my schedule is busy and I’ve been on the road touring 🙂 So I hope to blog more now on eczema. How exciting 🙂
August 19, 2009
Eczema case studies
Its been awhile I know. Lots has happened to me. But first things first. I got an email from Jenny Woods from the UK. If you are in the UK maybe you might like to help Jenny. I have copied and pasted her email below. If I was there I would do it. GBP100 is a lot of money 🙂
Hello,
I hope you don’t mind me contacting you. I’ve been researching eczema support groups and am looking to recruit case studies that would be willing to talk about how their eczema has effected them and their families. The case study would need to be willing to have an interview with a journalist (possibly a photo too) to be featured in a newspaper or woman’s magazine. I was wondering if you thought any of the British members of your facebook eczema group may be interested?
We offer ÂŁ100 worth of shopping vouchers for each story published. Each case study is handled with discretion and case studies may remain anonymous if they prefer.
If any of your members are interested or you would like to speak to me for further details please don’t hesitate to contact me.
Best Wishes,
Jenny
Jenny Woods
SPINK
01444 484888
http://www.spinkpr.com
Jenny@spinkpr.com
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Trading address: East Barn, Grange Farm, Ardingly Road, Lindfield RH16 2QY
Registered Office: 69 Church Road, Hove BN3 2BB
March 10, 2009
Allergy and eczema
For me they go together. Recently I was at a shoot for a local drama. Was on location the whole day. And I did not have time to prepare my food to bring along. My food. The ones that I know does not have anything I am allergic too.
Time can for the runner to buy dinner. He was nice enough to ask me what I can’t eat. So I have him the list. He was listening intently to what I had to say and wrote it all down. Dinner came around and everyone stopped to eat. I had noodles. It was black in colour. I had a feeling it had oyster sauce in it, but did not want to complain. I went on eating. I did not complain because there was no restaurants near there or fast food place that they could run too and reorder my dinner. Besides by the time everyone had finished it was time to continue the shoot. Then I really would not have time to eat. And I can’t work on an empty stomach.
As a result. My eczema on my face and neck and front portion of my shoulder and the front of my elbow and the back of my knees are bad and itchy. After the dinner incident I have had not slept much. Every time lay my head down my neck touches the bedding, as it naturally does, the itch starts. So in the end I sit up and felt unhappy. I’m sleepy yet itchy and cannot sleep because. There was one night I could not sleep till 8.30am. It was the shear sleepiness of the sleepless night that got me to bed.The next night I took a sleeping pill. I know that if I did not take the pill I would not be able to sleep again. Three nights in a row of not sleeping takes a toll.
I have to always be ready for camera. This gives me stress and stress does not help the issue. Its like a vicious circle.
Today its getting better. All dried up and flaky. The minute my neck hits the bed there it goes again, the dreaded itch. It flakes so much, and the flakes are minute, that I have to dust my bed everyday. And when the flakes fall off on their own it feels sand on my shoulder or it looks like dandruff on my clothes. Either way it not a nice after feeling.
I really feel upset this time because I share a bed with my husband. Though he does not complain I feel really guilty and shy at the same time.
I know the allergy will pass and I have been through this episode so many times is like a broken record. It not like a rerun of friends.
I hope to sleep tonight without the help of my sleeping pill. I don’t want to be addicted to sleeping pills. Which I am fearful off.
Sleepy and tired.
Itchy
July 25, 2008
I’ll miss you!
A couple of months ago a wonderful friend died. When I got the call I was shocked. She died of Cancer. Hardly anyone knew she had cancer besides her closest and dearest. She kept in under wraps I guess to save others from seeing her suffer and that if she had to go people would remember her when she was healthy. The cancer took her away so fast that when I got the call I was in the state of shock and disbelief. It was only at the memorial service that I got to know more details about what happened.
My entry this time is about her because she too was an eczema sufferer. The day I found that out was the day we became close. We were on the phone and exchanged notes about our suffering till we laughed so hard tears came to our eyes. It was a relief that both of us found someone that could relate to what were went through as a child and what it feels like living with eczema as an adult. She was also kind enough to share her story on the eczema website I built.
During her memorial service that I attended, one thing that struck me that day. You see she was an advocate for women’s rights. So her work touched so many lives. The people who attended came from all sorts of different backgrounds. From different religions to different ages to different sexual orientation to different races. EVERYBODY was there. She put her own suffering aside with eczema and helped others with theirs. She did this till the very end.
Now her own suffering has ended both in her cancer and her eczema. I miss her terribly. Now I hang on to the memories of her greeting me with long and tight hugs that were so loving it just melted your troubles away. The smiles she gives out were contagious and her laughter was the same. And her finite energy to rage war against injustices of the human kind to other humans. Even to those who did her wrong. And lastly the legacy she left behind, because she did not only have one memorial day, she had several. From different sect of the community locally and globally.
May she rest in peace and may Allah bless her.
Amen.
June 6, 2008
I can’t live a “normal” life.
Eventhough I did say that my eczema is getting better, I have to constantly remind myself that I have allergies that can trigger my eczema. These allergies will not go away! Hubby bought a few packets of crisps. Its walkers crisps. I think its more for the nostalgia and where the tastes of it brings us in our childhood is the reason we bought it. 🙂
I ate a couple of bags the other day and now my almost clear skin is itchy from the crisps and my eczema has turned up on my neck, the folds of my arms and patches around my mouth, cheek and forehead. I have to resort to putting on my steroid cream on those areas.
I know I have to still live like I have full blown eczema even though my skin is on the road to recovery. But its hard! When my skin almost feels normal I want to feel normal just like everyone else. I want to be able to go out with friends and not be hindered by my eczema. I want to eat without checking with the waiter if there are any ingredients that I can’t eat. I want to be able to put on nice clothes without getting to hot and itchy. I want to wear make-up without thinking will I have a reaction to it. I want to be able to got through the automatic passport lane at the airport where they check your thumb print before you leave the country instead of going though the manual lane. ( I don’t have any finger prints because of my eczema) I want to be able to go for extreme sports without thinking whether the water or the sun or the wind or the equipment might just cause my eczema to erupt and itch like crazy. I want to be able to do all the things that I love to do and eat but its all just a dream.
Sometimes I pretend that things will be ok only to get up the next morning and find my eczema there for me to nurture till its comfortable and that my plans for the day needs to be readjusted. When I readjust them I have to disappoint people. And when you disappoint people who don’t understand what you are going through you will start to lose friends. The walls start becoming coming in on you and your world starts to get emptier in a world full of people. This is when depression sets in. If you can identify its depression then you can do something about it. Its when your can’t that close friends and family patience’s are being tested. The good thing is you can filter friend from foe, and family… well…. that you can filter too. The ones that remain. Well…. you have to be patient with them because they have a certain amount of patients too.
You would think after 34 years I would have come to terms with it. But each time I try its just gets harder to do. I think its because i don’t get the support I need to see it through.
Time and time again I fall into the trap of thinking that I am normal and can live a normal life when my skin is better. I have not learnt my lesson. This is one time when optimism does not work. I have to change my mind set. I think that is the key. I have to still live like I have full blown eczema and face the never ending challenges. I have to make it part of life and stop thinking that I am normal because I’m not. I have a disability that no one in my life or in this country understands unless you are a sufferer yourself. I have to suffer in silence and smile at adversities.
How I have to change my mind set, I don’t know quite yet. I think it has to start with complete and utter acceptance coupled with taking the responsibility that comes with acceptance. That’s such a tall order. Trying to change my mind set is not key. Making the decision and sticking to it is. Coming to that end is the most frightening thing of all.
ItChy
June 2, 2008
coming out of a two year relapse
I started my relapse just after I got married. I figured it was the stress of a new life with someone and not making the same mistake with my last marriage that really wound me up something chronic. Its now been two years and five months and my marriage is strong, full of love and in a happy place. He’s been great throughout my relapse. You can see he really can’t empathize with the itch and the pain (emotionally and physically), but when I really need time out to take care of my skin or just sleep, he is ever ready and willing to accommodate. I recently found that if friends want to come around and I’m not well to receive guests, he will say no or make other arrangements with them. So my fear of my eczema getting in the way of my marriage is long gone now.
We also moved from a very small and stuffy two bedroom apartment that you can hardly move in, to a beautiful house. We’ve been decorating and slowly buying furniture here and there, unpacking boxes. Its been so much fun. When my skin gets agitated by the dust, besides doing the necessary to calm it down, I just think of the end result and smile. That helps too.
The other factor of my relapse is that I wanted a baby. Now we sorted that issue out things are calmer. We have found a solution for this problem and when I get preggers I figure this blog will be filled with information that I’ve researched on eczema and pregnancy. So I’m looking forward to that.
Another area of my life that added to my stress was work. I had decided when I got married that I would not work in the first year and sort out moving house, getting adjusted to married life and having a baby. I was so bored that it affected my skin. So after the year ended I decided to go back to work. That was harder than I thought. Well now, after a year things a picking up slowly, but during that year it was hell. Even though I have 5 years experience as a TV Presenter and I have a masters degree as a journalist, I just think they still want Pretty Young Things first and foremost. So I’ve had to re-adjust my career decisions and direction.
I know that not only food allergies and the environment affects the state of my eczema, but it is also my emotional well being. I have learnt to pin point what is the cause of my troubles. Its a long process with many a nights confused, soul searching and crying. But once i’ve identified it, (and sometime I do miss the mark) I talk to hubby on what best to do and let him know what my options are. That’s because what ever decisions I make will affect him too. If I do miss the mark I just have to readjust and take the next best option. All this is easy to write but definitely a process. Two years is a long time in my case.
My skin now is calmer with smaller relapse that don’t cause me to much trouble. It is very much under control. I can live very near normal now and I’m happy about it. So my plan is to live in the moment and take time to remember what its like to be this close to normal skin as possible. I’ll put it in my memory banks to when the next major relapse happens so that I can draw on the memory I’m making now so that I can look forward to being near normal again. 🙂
Being very happy.
Not so ITCHY
March 21, 2008
Menghidap ekzema tidak halang Azah terus aktif Oleh NOOR FAZRINA KAMAL
TIADA halangan bagi wanita ini memenuhi segala cita-citanya walaupun di sebaliknya beliau menderita sejenis penyakit kulit yang dinamakan ekzema.
Penyakit yang dialami oleh dua dari setiap 10 orang ini masih belum begitu mendapat pendedahan di kalangan ibu bapa dan pesakit. Bagi yang belum tahu, ekzema adalah sejenis penyakit genetik yang diwarisi dari ibu atau bapa atau kedua-duanya sekali.
Penyakit ini menyebabkan pengidapnya mengalami kegatalan kulit terutama di bahagian pelipat seperti di tengkuk, belakang lutut dan ruang antara tangan dan lengan. Apabila penghidap ekzema terdedah kepada habuk, cuaca terlalu kering atau peluh yang keluar dari badan, dia akan merasa gatal dan tidak dapat mengawal diri dari menggaru bahagian tersebut.
Kesan garu dan kulit yang sensitif menyebabkan kulit pesakit ekzema tidak lembut, warna seakan kehitaman, kasar dan berparut.
Bagi sesetengah penghidap ekzema, kesan atau parut kulit yang digaru menyebabkan mereka mengalami perasaan rendah diri.
Bagaimanapun anda tidak harus bersikap negatif kerana sebenarnya anda tidak keseorangan dan ada cara mengawal penyakit anda itu.
Nama Azah Yazmin Yusoff, 34, memang cukup terkenal di kalangan penonton yang pernah melihat beliau menjadi pengacara musim pertama 3R, bersama Rafidah dan Yuen.
Perwatakannya yang ceria dan paras rupa yang menarik menyebabkan beliau terpilih untuk menjadi pengacara rancangan berbentuk keremajaan itu. Bukan itu sahaja, beliau juga merupakan pelakon iklan, drama, pengacara majlis dan juga model.
Azah membuktikan tiada halangan bagi seorang penghidap penyakit ekzema untuk tampil yakin di khalayak ramai asal tahu cara mengawal penyakit mereka.
Menceritakan salah satu pengalaman yang tidak akan beliau lupakan, Azah berkata, pernah satu ketika ketika dia tiba di pintu imigresen Lapangan Terbang Antarabangsa KLIA, cap jarinya tidak jelas dan beliau terpaksa melalui pintu biasa untuk masuk ke negara ini. Garisan di ibu jarinya tidak jelas kerana kekeringan kulit yang melampau.
“Saya merupakan penghidap ekzema sejak dari kecil lagi, sejak dari itu sudah pelbagai jenis ubat saya cuba untuk mengurangkan penderitaan yang saya alami. Bukan setakat ubat-ubatan saintifik, malah tradisional, homeopati, rawatan tradisional Cina dan macam-macam lagi,” ujarnya ketika ditemubual di studio Utusan Malaysia, baru-baru ini.
Azah mengakui, penyakit kulit yang dideritainya ini tidak akan berakhir, namun adalah amat penting bagi seseorang yang menghidap ekzema itu tahu cara untuk mengawal penyakit mereka. Mengetahui punca kegatalan menyerang adalah salah satu cara mengawal penyakit tersebut.
“Macam saya, pengambilan makanan laut akan membuatkan kulit saya mengalami gatal yang luar biasa. Selain itu, saya juga pastikan kulit saya tidak kering dengan menggunakan losen khas untuk kulit sensitif seperti saya,” ujar Azah yang memiliki Ijazah Sarjana (master) Kewartawanan Televisyen dari Kolej Universiti Goldsmiths di London.
Bagi mengawal kegatalan akibat ekzema, Azah menggunakan barangan penjagaan kulit dari jenama Eucerin.
Sejak menggunakan cecair mandian dan losen PH5 Eucerin, Azah dapat mengurangkan kekeringan kulit dan seterusnya mengurangkan rasa gatal di kulitnya.
“Boleh dikatakan sudah beratus produk yang saya cuba untuk mengawal ekzema saya, saya dapati produk Eucerin betul-betul sesuai untuk saya dan ia amat membantu saya terutama apabila saya mempunyai urusan di luar seperti mengacara dan bekerja.
“Kadang kala saya terlepas makan makanan laut, akibatnya kegatalan menjadi-jadi, nasib baik ada losen Eucerin yang mengurangkan kegatalan itu, jika tidak, tentu kulit saya menjadi semakin teruk dan parut timbul di mana-mana saja,” jelasnya diiringi ketawa kecil.
Azah ingin mengajak sesiapa sahaja yang mengalami masalah kulit sepertinya untuk mengunjungi laman web http://www.eczema.webs.com atau http://www.atopiceczema.wordpress. com. Bagi yang ingin mengenali Azah dengan lebih lanjut boleh kunjungi blog Azah iaitu http://www.azahyazmin.webs.com.
(c) 2008 Utusan Malaysia
Diaries of an eczema sufferer 